Friday, March 26, 2010

Silence



Pulled for submission

12 comments:

Stephen Parrish said...

Publish this poem. That's an order.

wiredwriter said...

Yes, I agree. It's fantastic.

Sarah Hina said...

Steve, oh, FINE.

In all seriousness, I didn't want to post this one. But then I did it, anyway.


Wiredwriter, I appreciate that. Thank you for sticking with me. :) I've been awful about getting back to people lately. Luckily, this novel of mine is finally done (well, almost).

Karen said...

I'm glad you decided to post this. I've come back to read it a couple of times today already. Each image stands on its own strength with its particular sort of silence, but cumulatively, they create such a mood that the poem nearly overwhelms me.

I can't really choose one image or line as favorite, but the ending is a showstopper - a child sucking soap! Amazingly good, Sarah.

Sarah Hina said...

Karen, I found it a little overwhelming to write, too. I guess I wasn't sure about posting it because there's no joy in this kind of poem. And I hate to be a bummer right at the start of spring. :)

Thank you for your embrace of it, though. I am always very grateful for your good opinion, Karen.

Rick said...

The poem is wonderful, Sarah, but the last lines are brilliant and put the rest of the piece in proper order. Well done!

Tamarind~ said...

You painted it with easy. I call it mastery. I can go on reading it, again and again!

Aniket said...

Agree with Karen. One can't pick up favourite lines or dissect a piece like this. One can just read it. Then again. And just stare at those words in awe.

Follow Stephan's order. Erm. That's an order too. :P

Sarah Hina said...

Rick, you're very kind, and I really appreciate your comment. I'm glad those last lines worked for you so well.


Tamarind~, wow, that made me smile. I thank you for your enthusiasm. Again and again!


Aniket, you guys sure are getting bossy...yet you forget how lazy I am. ;)

Well, with praise like that, I won't hold it against you. Seriously, thank you. And aye, aye, cap'n!

joaquin carvel said...

(awestruk silence)

yes - brilliant - the silence surounding and the silence within - it doens't seem fair that you can write novels and poems like this. seriously amazing.

Sarah Hina said...

Joaquin, wait til you read the novel before saying that... :)

Thank you for those amazing words. Coming from a poet such as yourself, they mean a lot. And luckily, those silences you mentioned are rarely lasting.

catvibe said...

Sarah, this poem is just amazing you know. I mean like Karen said, each stanza stands on its own, and they all kind of say the same thing, that dark place between the living thing, that place we know so well and never want to speak. Your metaphors here are just excellent. Each one.