Eleanor,
how his sunlight adores you
Transforming your frock
into waves and white horses
Igniting your hair
with King Neptune’s touch.
Yet how like Hamlet to me
you are with your token!
Your youth arrested
by the pearl of a whisper
A crossroads suggested
in the purse of those lips
Grave before beauty
and the silence within.
Whereupon the gulls cried out
or your feet got drenched
The conch slips free
and Eleanor—I hear your laughter
As your father pauses
to mix ochre and ivory
and you take his light,
running.
8 comments:
I have read and reread this and the only thing to say is that I'm envious of your gift.
This is what I mean when I say I clunk and you flow. Always.
Beautiful.
You seriously have no idea how many times I've revised this one now. I clunk AND flow. You, my friend, simply glide. :)
Thank you for the sweet words! I loved discovering this painter. I thought of my grandma (named Elinor) being a girl around Eleanor's time, and my daughter now, and knew I had to write something.
Sarah I read and reread this and (not to be harsh) I had to look up her father before I could see the words of the portrait. That though is my lack of knowledge holding me back not your ability to drag me forward.
I, too, read and reread your wonderful poem, Sarah.
It reads like the flow of a gentle river that the reader doesn't want to see the end of. It draws you back to the beginning again and again.
You brought the painting alive with your words. I'm sure Frank W. Benson would love to have read this!
Mark, I actually thought it might be too oblique as is. But thanks for sticking with me, whichever direction I'm spinning in!
Margaret, thank you for that lovely sentiment. For some reason, I really felt the relationship between these two. What a beautiful tribute to his daughter he left us!
For once I completely agree to what Jazz said. I always agree with Margaret. :)
Some flow, some glide, some clank... I'm just stuck in reverse.
Eleanora is one of my fav. names. It's also one of the top contenders for the name I might give to my daughter, if I ever have a daughter. I love what it means too.
Bottom line(s): This poem. I like. You legend.
Eleanora is a lovely name. What are the other options for baby Thakkar?
Your comment. I like. You goose.
:)
It's not like I've put much thought into this. That would be really weir. (I'll mail you the list)
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